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BACK IN BLACK, THINKIN’ OUT OF BOX:

This is Office Lee Groinman, not sure who I am today…

Strange days, to be sure this week, yup coming off a semi-bye, then the sudden passing of Dave Niehaus.  Now comes the return of Rick Neuheisel. One guy leaving the Seattle scene forever but not forgotten as an icon, one guy returning to the Seattle scene for the moment but not forgotten as a carpet bagger. Well, Rick was only here for the moment anyway. Yeah, two guys with similar names, but two guys who don’t belong in the same sentence. Strange week fer sure…

Yeah, who am I today…

It’s like when I was a young kid, my Norwegian immigrant Grandmother Oliva would ask me;

“Leeson, who are you today?” I knew she talked funny. “I’m fine Gramma.”

“No! I said ‘who’ are you today!’ She’d laugh, she loved to play her Norwegian accent against the weirdness of the English language. if I said; “I’m Lee  Gramma.’ She’d say ‘No I said how are you today?’

I‘d play along, then she’d  bust out in her little joke, then I might get a hard candy, a pinch in the cheek, then a swat in the pants just for good measure…

But the real question now is “Who is the UW today?”

The team that beat SC on the road, last second style? Or the other guys? The ones that got slammed  by the Arizona’s, the one that stunk at BYU?

Or the one that showed up for Oregon?

I could hang with that. Holt had that defense dialed in, they just couldn’t sustain the ‘D’ the entire game, due to an offense that still is allergic to anything smellin’ of momentum, and a special teams unit that would make my Grandma laugh. And Grandma wouldn’t know a football from a toilet plunger…

God rest her soul…

Thing is, at Oregun, we catch a few drive sustaining passes, as in “CATCH THE DAMN BALL”! And don’t give up over 300 FRAKIN’ return yards! Then if we can just lighten up a bit on the brain dead penalties, the late hits, the unnecessary roughness,  Good Dawg Almighty, we clean some of that crap up, and shazzam…

Fellas, we just mighta’ had us a ball game down there in Eugene…

Speakin; of 300 FRAKIN’ return yards, the question’s been brought up a few times; Why don’t we just kick out of bounds?

Well, why don’t just wear pink jocks?

Actually, it’s a point well taken. Maybe we should also pooch kick on kick-offs, pooch it to where they ain’t, it’s a live ball, just might recover a couple. I wouldn’t punt anywhere inside the 40, what’s the point? Just might convert a fourth down or two, just don’t take the FRAKIN” SACK!

But speakin’ of kick-offs, It just grates my gizzards why Folk just doesn’t drill that ball to the belly of the end zone, 3, maybe 4 yards deep. He hit nearly a 60 yard field goal in practice, with 5 yards to spare! Come on! Just line it up like a driver and drill the basturd! Done deal, end of story…

Ah but the Special Teams… Ya’ know, for now I think it’d be a good idea if we just renamed those fellers just a scoosh, that’s Norwegian for just a notch, or just a bit. We could make friends with the Upper Campus zealots at the UW too, they’d love the PC angle. Ya’ see rather than call our ‘special’  teams special, which might indicate favoritism to the upper campus pointy noggins, we should just call our special teams;

The ‘Alternative Teams.

It’s not unlike the Husky Stadium announcer.

“Helloo Football Fans”…(Wouldn’t want to offend anybody…)

“THIRD DOWN….”

Holy Crapes, couldn’t Lou Gellerman  come back for Ucla and do a real;

“HELLLOO DAWG FANS!!!”

Then go take his seat. Dave Niehaus would agree…

Hey, what the hell, I’ll go out on a limb here. The Husky ‘alternative teams’ will improve this week.

“Say wha?” You say.

That’s right, Dawg Fans. A few players back from injuries, a bit of extra rest, a little more ‘butt-chewin’ from Nansen…You get the picture…can Nansen do that?

So what’s it gonna be, smash mouth Husky football with their pants on fire, or the other kind?

Seems now that Jake will start. What role will Price play?

Speakin’ of Price, saw many comments about the so called lack of ‘arm strength’. Good Dawg, Almighty, the ball ain’t that heavy, he just had some accuracy problems with some of his passes, more were dropped. Come on fellas, it’s not like we haven’t seen enough of that already…

I did like what I saw in Keith Price, he may have had a few cases of the yips, it was hard to tell, maybe just not enough repetitions. It’s like the old coach I had, outside of his barn-yard references to the male anatomy, he would also hammer home the importance of repetition.

“It’s all about repetition. Repetition, repetition, repetition. Repeat, repeat, repeat…”

So you see folks, it’s all about repetition, repeat…

Yup, I liked what Price did. I’m no moral victory kind of guy, but you probably already knew that, Price did not cost us a ball game down there in Eugene, no Sir. The way Groinman here has got it figured, the Washington Alternative Teams cost us around 21 points, I can’t remember off hand right now if that two point conversion came on behalf of alternative teams or not. Not a big issue at the moment….

DANG NABBITT!

But hey, a few more caught balls and we just might have seen the end zone a time or two, that’s 14 points. Folk makes the missed field goal and bam! Add it up, that’s around 37 points…

Classic ‘coulda’, woulda’, shouda’…

Would have liked to see that game played in Seattle, our time is a comin’…

So now it’s time to forget about all things Eugene. Holt exposed them, a better team than us will pluck ‘em. Would like to see them in the Title game, just to help our cause for a Bowl game. On the other hand, I’d be just as happy to see the Beavers bitch slap them in Corvallis, but I’m done with ducks…Ya know, if Cal had caught a couple more crucial passes and eliminates a brain cramp on a gimme kick…

Sound familiar?

But I’m done with all things duck…

On a side note, I’d like to give Woodward a double-kick in the pants. First one for the North/South cave in, the second for scheduling this cluster mess, this Thursday night game in Seattle. UW is not geared for Thursday night games. They could be. Cancel all classes at 2 pm. Yeah, like that’s gonna happen at the UW…That would require some thinkin’ outside the box, some leadership, that kind of decision would take a real man. Not sure if Ms. Wise and Woodward combined could pass muster, or even comprehend the thought…

I remember when this game was announced, the excitement on the message boards, the exposure….

 My response? What a UW cluster…

Yup, cancel all classes at 2 pm. Make them up on Saturday afternoon, Sunday evening. Hell Tuesday night ‘Midnight Matness’ in the class room, I don’t care. Students and faculty both could ‘take one for the team’. That’s right. Take some ownership in this Bowl Quest.

Hope it works out. The powers that be are making it a real tough deal these days, beware…

Yeah, time for all fans to ‘take one for the team’.  Take the bus, take a boat, ride your bike. My sister has a parkin’ pass, my folks are ridin’ with her and my brother-In–law is driving. I’m invited, my cousin, the Reverend LeRoy officiating….

Let the ‘Family Feud’ begin…did I say ‘take one for the team…’

HOLY CRAPES…

One more kick in the pants for Woodward, well placed…

Did I say Quest? Of course you saw McHugh, the owner of FX McRory’s sittin’ in his Pioneer Square restaurant, and talking in the Seattle Times about saving the rebuild dollars for Husky Stadium, then rerouting those dollars for scholarships, and play all home games at Quest Field? I Bet he never attended a Husky game, more like he wanted those rebuild dollars rerouted  into his wallet…go figure…

The smuck…

Yeah, classes should have been canceled for this Ucla game at 2 pm. Nobody ever skip class? Give the Seattle Times something worthwhile to complain about for once. They could have used that angle for years…

Another, coulda’, woulda’ shouda’… UW style.

The UW fan base, just another after thought…

BACK IN BLACK: With the new black jerseys being unfolded, bring a black garage bag and wear it.  I wore them in the Stanford rain a few times. They work and this could be the first time in the History of Husky Football that the crowd is actually color co-ordinated. That alone is worth the price of admission…An awesome new tradition…purely accidental thinking out of box.

Another new tradition begins, a three week war, a three week quest for Bowl Game…

GO DAWGS!

GRUMBLINGS: Did I say BOWL GAME? It starts now.  As I’ve said for weeks now, Beware of Cougs in Pullman…Dawg’s know it, or it’s another coulda’, wouda’, shouda’…

Big Night for the DAWGS! Thursday evening is the reason for Jakes return… If not?

Not a good day to be a Ucla Bruin or a Neuheisel. Dave Niehaus would agree…

But I gotta tell ya’ this; I’ve always just been a casual Mariners fan, but even I knew that Dave Niehaus was a Special Teamer, one with capital letters. The best there could ever be. The biggest Mariner loss of all time, and that’s saying a bunch. God Bless you Mr. Dave Niehaus.

And now for the fun stuff!

OUR FEATURED DAWG OF THE WEEK: HOW ‘BOUT THIS GUY! DENALI!

                                                                         

     Denali is young but mature gentleman, well mannered and smart, strong too, good sized bugger. You can see and read more about Denali and friends at www.wamal.com   Denali is ready for home adoption now. But he just got here! A fun boy.         

 

 

 

Lee Groinman can be reached at malamute@4malamute.com

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