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Rental Cars, Pimps and Hookers, One Hot Ticket;

This is Officer Lee Groinman, That’s Right Washington’s Most Renewed Cop

Ya’ know I gotta tell ya’ this folks. I just had some surgery done on my head, a little brain salad surgery, but this one was concentrated mainly on my left earball. I’d been mainly deaf on my left side for some time now, like say 15 years…. I didn’t want to admit to being compromised and I read somewhere that your body can make adjustments for some of its short comings, say in my case, your left ear is deaf, then your right ear becomes stronger, yeah right.

Sleeping is enhanced while deaf. Another great line, you sleep on your right side, keeping your right ear stuffed into that pillow and your left ear is oblivious to everything, including the alarm clock and the pesky wife…

So I had me one of those ‘stapedectomey’ type surgeries. They take that little stapes bone out of your eardrum, it’s the smallest bone in the body, but it still hurt like Dante’s Inferno. Well anyway the stapes bone comes out, so in effect you aren’t as stapid anymore. The little bone is replaced by a wire and the hearing is restored to levels I hadn’t heard before. Brings a whole new meaning to;

DO YOU HEAR ME!

Ah yes, not much gets by me these days.

I’ve told you before that there is no such thing as coincidences, only omens. I listen to omens very carefully with both ears now. Seems in the past six months I’ve dealt with more than my share of pimps, well that didn’t come out quite right, ugh, I’ve dealt with more than my share of those fellas who promote in the flesh trade, the oldest ‘profession’ in the world. We’ve had a rash of these fellas come thru the House of Pain recently, now we’ve got the Venoy Overton saga…

(See Times' article "Overton arrested for allegedly promoting prostitution.")

Hokey smokes, just sickening. In many ways pimps are the lowest of the low. I’d rather deal with a rapist and a child molester (a ‘chi-mo’) than a pimp. The pimp is a three-headed evil. One, they’re a con man. Two, they want somebody else to do the dirty work and they get theirs, money for nuthin’. And three, they got the soul of a pig. No pigs are okay I like the pig, make that the soul of a rat…

And they’re lazy basturds too…

Then I find out that Venoy Overton’s middle name is Lee.

Holy J. Crapes! What an honor…

I do hope that Venoy’s down time will teach him a thing or two, assuming he's guilty.

I’ve never seen a pimp reform. I’m sure it’s happened, just not on my watch. The pimp has this air about them, an unnatural cockiness, a God’s gift mentality, an over-inflated ego. A ‘my stuff don’t stink’ attitude.

And they’re lazy basturds too…

I see where Venoy was allegedly gonna pay the girl back ‘tenfold’ when he got drafted by the NBA. I see where none of Venoy’s NBA buddies have come up with his bail…

Good luck with that NBA draft and that bail there Venoy, paybacks are ‘tenfold’ right?

When you think of it, Ol’ Venoy worked at laser speed. He walks across the podium and gets his diploma on a Saturday, and by Thursday afternoon he’s graduated to the Big House. Not many here can stake claim to that.

Godspeed Venoy.

Well I do hope that Overton has what’s known in jail house circles as a ‘Come to Jesus Moment’, that’s when a convict sees the light and gets his mind right. Could happen, or not…

But boys will be boys. How ‘bout the duck Cliff Harris? Another prime citizen. This kid has the makings of a potential pimp. Consequences mean nuthin’ to him. Things will get taken care of, or disappear, it’s the Oregon way.

(See "Oregon's Cliff Harris stopped for driving 118 mph with suspended license").

It still bedazzles me how this kid can be stopped so many times and not get hooked up. Why if I didn’t know better I’d think the Oregon State Patrol was on the take. He’d been stopped three times before this 118 MPH time trial with a suspended license, so maybe Eugene PD has some egg on its face? And what about the Judge or Judges who continually let this kid walk? At least three ‘failure to appear’ and no warrant?

What kind of state are they runnin’ down there in Oregon?

Keystone Cop Central, Keystone Cops on the take?

There’d be some serious ‘’splainin’ to do if they all were in Washington…

I hear Hertz Rental car is planning on moving their regional and district offices to Eugene. Bidness must be good…

So now the NCAA is sending some lawyer investigator types down to the funky climes of Eugene. The new theme song for the ducks will soon be Warren Zevon’s;

Send Lawyers, Guns, and Money”.

“I was gambling down in Houston…

I took a little risk…

Send Lawyers, Guns, and Money.

Uncle Phil!

Get me out of this!”

Good ol’ Zevon, RIP, miss that guy. Uncle Phil, not so much…

The interesting thing here is Uncle Phil himself. On top of Willie Lyles, Cliff Harris, the accounts payable department, Hertz Rent-a-Car, various police agencies, and a couple of Judges…

What would Uncle Phil do?

My guess is to take a tour of some overseas Nike factories, a very long tour…

I always buy New Balance and Under Armour…Nike can go kick rocks…

Yup, the more I think about it, the more I think Mike Bellotti bailed when the bailin’ was good…

But what a week for recruiting, Sark got on a roll! Tweet this!

Too bad the rest of the class wants to wait until the last second to commit. Some will get nervous and commit before the home opener with the defending National Champs Eastern Washington. Hopefully some of the in state offensive lineman, they’re off the charts…

I’m thinkin’ the key cog here is Walker Williams. If Walker hops in Sark’s boat it will make it that much easier for Banner and Garnett to follow. Banner and Garnett want to see all the bigs, take all the trips. That will wear on them. With Williams in the boat the decision will be easier for the both of them, like greased hogs on a slippery slope…

The Pierce County Combo wants to play on the same team.

Trust me folks, I’m from Fife…

Good Dawg Almighty! It was just a few weeks ago when some of those experts on the message boards were sayin’ that Williams wasn’t yet worthy of a scholarship offer…

Bothersome when some of these experts get to doin’ their own thinkin’, out loud and all…

Speakin’ of Eastern Washington, dang I wished that Taiwan Jones, the running back from Eastern would have stuck around for another year. The kid is a specimen. Well he took the bucks and got drafted in the 4th round by the Raiders, can’t wait to see him against the Seahawks. He could have made the Eastern / UW game, a game. Now I’m not sure if Eastern will score. I’m an Eagle, if you couldn’t tell. I’ll be wearing that purple and red shirt…

Yup, would have loved to see Taiwan Jones play in Husky Stadium, I wish him luck with the Raiders, he’ll be fine, but if that don’t work out, and with a name like Taiwan, he could probably get a job working for Uncle Phil Knight…

So now it is just gonna be Bo Levi Mitchell and that tall drink of a receiver for Eastern. Gotta like a kid by the name of Bo Levi, he’s a helluva quarterback, heck I think I’ll name my next dog Bo Levi…but not enough for Eastern. Delaware dominated the lines of scrimmage in the Championship game, Delaware? Both Dawg lines will dominate Eastern.

Well folks, with this new ear of mine I’m startin’ to feel like a new finely tuned machine! It’s like that ol’ song from the 70’s.

“I can hear clearly now

The pain is gone,

Gonna be a bright, bright, bright sun shinny day.”

Holey Crapeola, where’d that come from?

Take November 5th for example. Might not be much sun, but oh how it’s gonna be so good…Ducks…

If you don’t have tickets for this game, may I suggest you get an evaluation. How many of you missed the September 22nd 1990 “All I saw was purple” 31-0 blanking of SC? Now is your chance for this century’s version…

The last game in Husky Stadium as we know it. We’re playin’ the ducks. Somehow the football Gods have paid us back. What was it? We played 5 out of 7 duck games in Eugene? Now we get them in our house for the last time as it were. The Cal Bears stole a couple recruits of ours last year. We got to play Cal for the last time in their stadium as they knew it. How’d that work out?

Paybacks are such the bitch…

Yup, the ducks do not win this year in Husky Stadium, who do you think we are?

The Cal Bears?

GO DAWGS!

GRUMBLINGS: I wonder if Willie Lyles will be showing up for the Oregon game? Would that be asking too much? Austin Seferian-Jenkins lined up over Cliff Harris? Ta’amu lined up over anybody? Special, real special…

More Kiffen news? Kiffen on the hot seat suddenly at SC? Haden comin’ after Sark? Kiffen’s got a 4 million dollar contract with years to go, and years of sanctions to go with it. That’s a whole bunch of contract to eat, and Sark won’t go for that piece of pie…

THE FEATURED DAWG OF THE WEEK! Meet MICA!

90KB. Click to Enlarge.   94KB. Click to Enlarge.  119KB. Click to Enlarge.

Mica is a young male adult, who weighs in at about 75 pounds, but he still has a few more pounds to pack on. He is plenty strong, and with another 6 months with Ivan Lewis, this guy should be starting. And look, he’s got his own purple leash! This guy is ready… Mica is active, loves to hike, walk, run, and ride. Mica and his buds can be seen at;

www.wamal.com  READY FOR ADOPTION NOW!

 

Lee Groinman can be reached at malamute@4malamute.com

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