This is Officer Lee Groinman. That’s Right, Washington’s Most Reflective Cop…

So here I am, in my Lazy Boy chair doin’ some reflectin’.

On a Milestone BIRTHDAY!!

That’s Right, Happy Birthday to me…

Got me an early birthday present last Saturday against the clueless Utah Utes, a revelation that’s been for the most part, self effident for the better part of this century. I suppose it takes some folks a little longer to ‘get it’, but oh boy, did I finally “get it”.

The college game, at least on the Pac-12 stage is fixed.

The fix is in…

It hurts me greatly to write that, but the Pac-10, er Pac-12 has reeked to high hell since the carpetbagger Larry Scott showed up.

Some will say; “Sure, the league sucks now, but Larry brought a butt-load of cash into the Pac-10, and made it into the Pac-12!!”

And gave all those cash strapped programs a life-saving cash infusion…saved wsu, osu...

And put both new-comer Utah, and Colorado, both into the recruiting hot bed of the Southern division!!

In a sense I’m relieved, as I know now, it all makes sense…the smucks on the field...

Now that I’m officially a year older, and those 300 mile road trips to Husky Stadium are not getting any shorter, or anytime earlier in the morning…I find myself asking myself this question, much like the late Richard Pryor did, when he asked himself quite bluntly…. as the Rev. LeRoy asked himself that eternal question…the question being??

“How long!! HOW LONG!! How long, can this BULL**** GO ON!!

Well, the answer to that, Reverend LeRoy??

Too long…

And of course, the Dawgs don’t need to keep up that five turnovers a game ratio up. They can back off on that just a bit, especially against teams they are under-dawgs against, that would help score a victory or two, but it feeds into the excuse;

“We are still a young team!”

So ‘young’ teams’ are allowed to fumble the ball away 4 or 5 times a game? But only against games where dawgs are not expected to win? So we can lose with respect? Rather than take a ‘W’? A ‘politically correct’ position, and one that bites. More like a pattern…and excuse me fella’s, some of our more ‘experienced’ players are costing us the games with the screw-ups, not the young guys, and then again, those ass-hats in the shirts and whistles….

Lord Have Mercy...

But even if the Dawgs can survive all that self-imposed mayhem, the refs can insure the rest…

Mayhem can cost you increased insurance premiums too…no lighter fluid at tailgates with matches and shet…

No wait, the fix...I get carried away…

Just watch the game. Greatly convenient how a Utah team stays in the top 20 and is in position for a North-South Championship game, while a loss to the Dawgs would have put a hole in the Utah Ark…a win by the UW would have greatly hurt Utah, the Pac-12, and Larry Scott…

Can’t be hurting the Pac-12 and his Holy, the Larry Scott...

A win by the UW would have meant little to nothing to the Pac-12, even less to Larry Scott…much less to Larry…

We might have appreciated a fair game and the win, but who are we? I drove 300 miles, took a day off work, another 8 hours of vacation time, as I work Saturdays, then the 50 bucks in gas But hey, I’m home at midnight, early for the first time in a month…I should offer up some worship!! It’s not 3 am like usual, but Utah got the ‘cough’ win.

Bite me…

Some of you may say, “Just look Lee, bad calls always balance out!”

Say What? I’ve been waiting for years for the Pac to ‘balance’ out. The timing of the calls, on the road, and especially at home…I can’t even go there right now…As I’m one year older now…

Show some respect...

Some of you might now say; “But hold the fort Lee!! We won down in LA against USC! That was a great road win!!”

I thought it so too Pilgrim. But now it’s clear, the Pac-12 ‘allowed’ us that win, that game at USC. Now look at the big picture. The USC big donors and Pat Haden himself had had enough, enough of Steve Sarkisian…and Sark’s escapades??

What better way to dump Steve Sarkisian, and keep the SC faithful happy, and to throw the patsy UW Dawg fans a bone, all in one swipe!!

Brilliant!!

That Larry Scott…that Larry, one step ahead of the game…what a guy….

So now us Dawgs travel down to the Valley of the Sun to face the Arizona Sun Devils…

But Fear Not My Husky Faithful;

“For Even Though We Walk Thru the Valley of the Sun, We Shall Fear No Evil…”

As both the Arizona State Sun Devils and the UW Huskies have identical 4-5 season records…

The Pac- 12 office may hardly take notice of this game, and they just may hand it off to the WSU/ASU officials. Some of those officials may not even need to change rooms…others are still at the “Sonic Drive-in.”

However Dawg fans, take notice, ASU is still 3-2 in league play while our Huskies are lagging behind at 1-2. A full two games behind ASU. Expect 1.5 bad calls to go against the Huskies combined with another two bad non-calls, and of course at least two more official announcements from our black and white striped role models, the standard bearer of our sport…those being the refs…and their announcement being…

“The call on the field has been declared okay.”

Meanwhile, Larry Scott is watching women’s tennis in his black leathers…while counting his cash…

Keep the faith…

The key is, is to be in position in late October for a Bowl Bid. Win early and often, do not be on the outside looking in...

Send Larry to a whole new gig…selling Dr. Pepper…Dr. Pepper could use another Larry…

GO DAWGS!!

I FEEL BETTER NOW!!

GO DAWGS!! 

Be it so….

 

 

 

Lee Groinman can be reached at malamute@4malamute.com

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